By Neil Earle
The Bible says simply: “I can do everything through him who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:6). With Jesus Christ living inside of us we have hope: we can gain the upper hand over anger. And what a blessing if we do.
“The manifestations of the emotions of anger are so numerous that Dr. W.B. Cannon of Harvard required an entire printed page to merely list them,” writes Dr. John Schindler in How to Live 365 Days a Year. The external manifestations are obvious: a red face, bloodshot eyes, stomach muscles squeezing down. But that is only half the story:
“The entire digestive tract becomes spastic, triggering severe abdominal pains. The heart rate goes up markedly…the coronary arteries squeeze down hard enough to produce angina or even a fatal coronary” (pages 25-26).
No wonder the Bible counsels: “Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret – it leads only to evil” (Proverbs 37:8). Yet we say: “Don’t fret – in this day and age? Surely the Bible is kidding us.” But wait! There’s more: “Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools” (Ecclesiastes 7:9). We reply: “But you don’t understand. If you lived where I did would you’d be stirred up to.”
And the Bible replies, calmly, soothingly, like a mother’s voice: “A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly” (Proverbs 14:29).
In spite of these excellent prescriptions from God’s words millions of us get entangled with anger every day. Even our slang is dangerous: “She makes me sick!” He burns me up!” “I really blew my stack” and the coup de grace: “I could kill him!”
This is serious, for bitter and hasty words are often emotional preparation for the most fearsome acts. Jesus had to severely correct two of his own disciples for a vindictive hot-tempered attitude towards a despised ethnic group (Luke 9:51-56).
Of course, one of today’s misconceptions is that all anger is wrong. It isn’t. Jesus himself got angry. He was angry when he cleared the money changers from the Temple (John 2:13-17). He was angry at the stubborn Pharisees in Matthew 23. But this was controlled anger. “In your anger do not sin,” Paul taught. “Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry” (Ephesians 4:26).
We can be sure that Jesus radiated this kind of concerned, loving, solution-oriented anger.
But most anger we see about us today is sin. People blowing up after the drip-drop-drip of petty annoyances. Husbands retaliating at wives. Bosses “dumping” on their subordinates. That is overt anger, easy to spot and – hopefully – possible to avoid.
But there is another kind of anger that comes from slow, simmering attitudes deep inside. This is latent anger and resentment, a festering kind of attitude that may take a long time coming to the surface. This is why Judas Iscariot and his critical, resentful spirit was not remotely suspected by the other disciples of harbouring bitterness or why a man in our time, passed over for promotion, murdered four people “in cold blood.”
Anger is emotional preparation for murder. This is what Jesus labelled it so seriously (Matthew 5:22). The consequences can be hidden. “Depression at every phase of its development,” wrote neurologist Mortimer Ostow, “includes a component of anger, whether visible or invisible.” We all need help in navigating our way through the stresses and strains of a world tearing at us, a world seemingly designed to make us angry. Here are five principles that can help.
First, pray fervently when we see bitterness and resentment rising up inside us. We must thank God for showing to us our wrong thought patterns. Sin begins in the mind. That’s why we Christians have the noble goal to “take captive every thought” (2 Corinthians 10:5). That is a lifelong task. God the Holy Spirit will help us when we turn to him for help.
Second, keep the big picture of human existence in mind. It’s always good to ask: Will this really matter 100 years from now? And what if our adversary died and we had a grudge on our conscience. What then? It is good advice Peter gave: “Whoever would love life and see good days…must turn from evil and do what is good, he must seek peace and pursue it” (2 Peter 3:10-11).
Third, try sincerely to see the other person’s point of view. This is empathy, and oh, how rare today! Consider our Great Example. What did it take to say “Father forgive them, for they do not known what they are doing” (Luke 23:34) while they drove nails through his hands and feet. Meditating on this can leave us properly humbled, allow the fresh breezes of humility to cool the fires of anger.
Fourth, pray for your adversary. Nothing is more diametrically opposite to the human spirit, is it? But it is our human spirit of anger and hostility that often gets us in to so many scrapes. The apostle Paul wrote about “the coals of hot fire treatment.” Read it in Romans 12:20. Perhaps a simple card, a note, a sincere apology, a small gift or a simple resolve to treat the would-be opponent as a friend rather than an enemy could make all the difference in the world. Christians do not retaliate in kind. They are learning to walk the hard and stony path that replaces evil with good. This is tough but Jesus never said it would be easy; he did offer help along the way (Matthew 11:28).
Fifth, keep our spiritual vision clear. In the midst of severe tensions and conflicts, when we are tempted to respond in kind we must remember: God is the God of justice. He doesn’t expect us to police the universe for him. Do we really believe that those who violate principles of loving relationships can violate them with impunity? No. God is on his throne and he has a way of evening things up. The patriarch Joseph was a living example of this when he ended up with life and death power over the very brothers who had sold him into slavery (Genesis 42:1-9).
One experienced Christian put it this way:
“Truth forever on the scaffold,
Wrong forever on the throne –
Yet that scaffold sways the future,
And behind the dim unknown,
Standeth God within the shadow,
Keeping watch above His own.”
God is our ultimate Shelter against the tides of anger that threaten to engulf us. With that assurance we can win. We can win over anger.
The Bible is full of case histories that vividly sketch behaviour patterns to avoid:
That’s quite a collection. They are recorded to remind us that anger is a serious matter before both God and man.